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发布时间：2023-10-08 07:58:22   来源：文档文库   
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201TheOneWithRoss'NewGirlfriend[Scene:CentralPerk,Phoebeisrecappinglastseason,andasshetalksweseeamontagueofscenesfromRossandRachel.]PHOEBE:Ok,sothisisprettymuchwhat'shappenedsofar.RosswasinlovewithRachelsince,youknow,forever,buteverytimehetriedtotellher,somethingkindofgotintheway,likecats,andItalianguys.FinallyChandlerwaslike"forgetabouther"butwhenRosswasinChinaonhisdig,ChandlerletitslipthatRosswasinlovewithRachel.Shewaslike,"Ohmygod."Soshewenttotheairporttomeethimwhenhecameback,butwhatshedidn'tknowwas,thatRosswasgettingofftheplanewithanotherwoman.Uh-Oh!So,that'sprettymucheverythingyouneedtoknow.But,enoughaboutus.So,how'veyoubeen?OPENINGCREDITS[Scene,TheAirport,continuedfromlastseason,RacheliswaitingforRosstocomeoftheplane,whensheseeshe'scomingoffwithanotherwoman.]RACHEL:Ohmygod.Ohmygod.(Shedecidestomakeabreakforit.Excuseme.Move!Move!Emergency!Excuseme!(Shetriesclimbingoverabenchandfallsdown.ROSS:Rache!RACHEL:Oh,thereyouare!Hi!Oh,so,so,howwasChina,you?(Hitshimwiththeflowers.ROSS:Itwas,itwasgreat.Oh,whathappened?RACHEL:What?ROSS:You'rebleeding.
RACHEL:Iam?Oh,lookatthat,yesIam.Enoughaboutme,enoughaboutme,Mr.BackfromtheOrient.Iwannaheareverything!(LooksatJulieROSS:Well,wheredoIstart?ThisisJulie.Julie,thisisRachel.RACHEL:Theseare,thesearen'tforyou.(toJulieTheseareforyou.(Loudly,thinkingshecan'tspeakEnglish.Welcometoourcountry.JULIE:(Loudly,provingshecanspeakEnglish.Thankyou.I'mfromNewYork.RACHEL:Ok,well,notaproblem.We'lljustusethemtostopthebleeding.Ok.Baggageclaim?Ok.[Scene:MonicaandRachel's,thegangiswaitingforRacheltoreturnfromtheairportwithRoss.]CHANDLER:Noway!MONICA:I'mtellingyou,shewenttotheairport,andshe'sgonnagoforitwithRoss!
PHOEBE:Ohmygod.Thisishuge.Thisisbiggerthanhuge.Thisislike,allright,what'sbiggerthanhuge?JOEY:Um,this?PHOEBE:Yes.MONICA:Guys,yougotyourhaircut.CHANDLER:Yes,yes,wedid,thankstoVidalBuffay.PHOEBE:'Cause,youknow,(inthatvoiceifyoudon'tlookgood,wedon'tlookgood.Ilovethatvoice.RACHEL:(entering,outofbreathAirport,airport.Ross,notalone,Julie,armaroundher.Cramp,cramp.CHANDLER:Ok,Ithinkshe'stryingtotellussomething.Quick,gettheverbs.RACHEL:(toChandlerYou,you,yousaidhelikedme.(RossandJulieenterYou,youslowpokes!ROSS:That'sallright,Rache,wegotthebags.Hi,hello.Julie,thisismysisterMonica.ThisisChandler.Phoebe.Joey,whatup?JOEY:Whatup?!ROSS:Everyone,thisisJulie.RACHEL:(outofbreathJulie.ALL:Ohh.(HappilyHi!JULIE:Hi,butI'mnothere,youhaven'tmetme.I'llmakeamuchbetterfirstimpressiontomorrowwhenIdon'thave20hoursofcabandplaneonme.ROSS:Andbus.JULIE:Ohmygod.ROSS:Thescreamingguy?JULIE:Andthespitting?ROSS:Yougottahearthisstory.JULIE:We'reonthisbus,that'seasily200yearsold...ROSS:Atleast.JULIE:...andthisguy--RACHEL:Andthechickenpoopsinherlap.Oh,I'msosorry.Ijustgaveawaytheending,didn'tI?Oh!It'sjust,Ijustheardthisstoryinthecab,anditisallIcanthinkabout.MONICA:Thisisamazing.Imean,how,howdidthishappen?JULIE:Well,RossandIwereingradschooltogether.ROSS:Butwehaven'tseeneachothersincethen.WellIlandinChina,guesswho'sinchargeofthedig.
RACHEL:Julie!Julie,isn'tthatgreat?Imean,isn'tthatjustkick-you-in-the-crotch,spit-on-your-neckfantastic?MONICA:It'sanexpression.ROSS:Well,wejustwantedtosayaquickhi,andthenwe'regonnagoseethebaby.JULIE:Andthenwe'vegottagetsomesleep.ROSS:Yeah,it'sreally6:00tomorrownightourtime.CHANDLER:Well,listen,don'ttelluswhat'sgonnahappenthough,'causeIliketobesurprised.(RossandJulieexitRACHEL:Bye.(Sheclosesthedoorandeveryonetriestosympathizewithher.[Scene:CentralPerk,RossandChandlerenter.]ROSS:Hey,Rache,canIgetsomecoffee?RACHEL:Yeah,sure.ROSS:Thankyou.CHANDLER:Hey,Rache,canIget--RACHEL:Didyoutalktohim?CHANDLER:Notyet.RACHEL:Then,no.(HegoestositdownnexttoRoss.CHANDLER:SowhatthehellhappenedtoyouinChina?Imean,whenlastweleftyou,youweretotallyinlovewith,youknow.ROSS:Iknow,IknowIwas,buttherewasalwaysthislittlevoiceinsidethatkeptsayingit'snevergonnahappen,moveon.Youknowwhosevoicethatwas?CHANDLER:God?ROSS:Itwasyou,pal.CHANDLER:Well,maybeitwasGod,doingme.ROSS:Look,youwereright.Shelooksatmeandseesafriend,that'sall.ButthenImetJulie,andIdon'tknow,we'rehavin'agreattime.AndIhavetosay,Ineverwould'vegoneforitwithherifithadn'tbeenforyou.CHANDLER:Well,youowemeone,bigguy.RACHEL:Here'syourlemonade.ROSS:Ididn'torderlemonade.RACHEL:Oh.Wellthen,youbettergotakethatbackbecausethey'regonnachargeyouforthat.ROSS:But--RACHEL:Gogogogo,comeon!(toChandlerSothen,well,whatdidyoufindout?CHANDLER:Hesaid,hesaidthatthey'rehavingagreattime.I'msorry.But,thesilverlining,ifyouwannaseeit,isthathemadethedecisionallbyhimselfwithoutanyoutsidehelpwhatsoever.RACHEL:Howisthatthesilverlining?CHANDLER:Youhavetoreallywannaseeit.[Scene:MonicaandRachel's,RossandthegangiswatchingTV.]ROSS:Ironically,thesearetheguyswhowerepickedlastingym.[cuttoPhoebeandMonicainthekitchen.]MONICA:Phoebes,youknowwhatI'mthinking?PHOEBE:Oh,ok.How,it'sbeensolongsinceyou'vehadsex,you'rewonderingifthey'vechangedit?MONICA:No,althoughnowthat'swhatI'mthinking.PHOEBE:Allright,sowhatwereyouthinking?MONICA:Well,Iwasthinking,thatyougavetheguyssuchgreathaircuts,Ithought,maybeyou'dliketodomine?PHOEBE:Ohh!No.MONICA:Whynot?PHOEBE:Because,I'mjust,I'mincrediblyanalandanunbelievablecontrolfreak.MONICA:Noyou'renot.PHOEBE:IknowI'mnot,butyouare,andIwastryingtospareyourfeelings.(Thephonerings.JOEY:(answeringthephoneHello?Oh,hi.Yeah,holdonasecond.Ross,it'sJulie,foryou.(Throwshimthephone.ROSS:(onphoneHello?Hi.CHANDLER:(enteringHi.Anybodyknowagoodtailor?JOEY:Needssomeclothesaltered?CHANDLER:No,no,I'mjustlookingforamantodrawonmewithchalk.JOEY:Whydon'tyougoseeFrankie?Myfamily'sbeengoin'tohimforever.HedidmyfirstsuitwhenIwas15.Nowait,16.No,'scuseme,15.(stillconfusedAllright,whenwas1990?CHANDLER:YouhavetostoptheQ-tipwhenthere'sresistance!ROSS:(onphoneOk,ok,sweetheart,I'llseeyoulater.Ok,bye.What?Oh,thatissosweet.No,no,ok,youhangup.Ok,ok,one,two,three.(motionsforRacheltobequietWellyoudidn'thangupeither.
RACHEL:Shedidn'thangupeither!ROSS:Ok,no,no,youhangup.You,you,y--RACHEL:(takingthephoneandhangingitupSorry,Ithoughtyouweretalkingtome.ROSS:Rachel!I'lljustcallherback.RACHEL:Okay!ROSS:(callsJuliebackHi?Sorry,wegotdisconnected...RACHEL:Ok,ok,ok.Howdidthishappentome?Howdidthishappentome?Aweekago,twoweeksago,Iwasfine.RosswasjustRoss,justthisguy.Nowhe'sRrrooossss,oh,thisreallygreatguythatIcan'thave.MONICA:Sweetie,Iwantedyoutohavehimtoo.RACHEL:Iknowyoudid.I'mjustgonnadealwithit,I'mjustgonnadealwithit.(Rosscomesby,smochingwithJulieonthephone.Igottagetoutofhere.CHANDLER:Ok,Idon'tcarewhatyouguyssay,something'sbotheringher.[Scene:MonicaandRachel's,thenextmorning.]JOEY:Youknow,IthinkIwassixteen.MONICA:Please,justalittlebitofftheback.PHOEBE:I'mstillon"no".RACHEL:(pokingherheadinfromherbedroomUh,morning.Doyouguysthinkyoucouldcloseyoureyesforjustasec?JOEY:Nonononono,(grabshispantsI'mnotfallin'forthatagain.PHOEBE:What'sgoin'on?RACHEL:Well,Isortadidastupidthinglastnight.CHANDLER:Whatstupidthingdidyoudo?PAOLO:Bongiornotutti!PHOEBE:Ewww!COMMERCIALBREAK[Scene:MonicaandRachel'scontinuedfromearlier.]RACHEL:Ok,Paulo,whydon'tyoujustgogetdressed,andthenyoubeonyourway,ok,bye-bye.MONICA:Rachel,howdidthishappen?RACHEL:Idon'tknow,Ijustkindaranintohimlastnight.PHOEBE:Where?RACHEL:Athisapartment.Isthisjuice?JOEY:Whoa,whoa.AndthefactthatyoudumpedhimbecausehehitonPhoebe?RACHEL:OhGod,IknowI'mapatheticloser.MONICA:Honey,you'renotpathetic,you'resad.CHANDLER:Peopledostupidthingswhenthey'reupset.MONICA:Mygod,ifIhadanickelforeveryguyIwishIhadn't--butthisisaboutyourhorriblemistake.ROSS:Hi.Sorrywe'relatebutwewere--well,therewastouching.PAOLO:Hey,heyRoss.ROSS:Hey,Paulo.Whatareyoudoinghere?PAOLO:IdoRaquel.ROSS:(toRachelSo,uh,he'sback.RACHEL:Yeah,he'sback.Isthataproblem?ROSS:No,notaproblem.RACHEL:Good!I'mgladit'snotaproblem.PHOEBE:Ok,you'regonnahavetonottouchmyass.CHANDLER:Well,inspiteoftheyummybagelsandpalpabletension,I'vegotpantsthatneedtobealtered.JOEY:Hey,Chandler,whenyouseeFrankie,tellhimJoeyTribbianisayshello.He'llknowwhatitmeans.CHANDLER:Areyousurehe'sgonnabeabletocrackthatcode?MONICA:Youknowit'sfunny,thelasttimePaulowashere,myhairwassomuchshorterandcuter.PHOEBE:Allright.Ok,but,butyouhavetopromisethatyouwillnotbealllikecontrol-yandbossyandMonicaaboutit.MONICA:Ipromise.PHOEBE:Allright.Nowsomeofyouaregonnagetcut,andsomeofyouaren't.ButIpromisenoneofyouaregonnafeelathing.[Scene:Monica'sbedroom,Phoebeisfinishingwithherhaircut.]PHOEBE:Allright,that'sit,Iquit.MONICA:What?Ididn'tsayanything.PHOEBE:Yeah,butthisisn'tthefaceofapersonwhotrustsaperson.Ok,thisisthefaceofapersonwho,youknow,doesn'ttrustaperson.MONICA:I'msorry.I'msorry,Phoebe.It'sjustalittleshorterthanwhatwehaddiscussed.PHOEBE:Wouldyourelax?IknowwhatIamdoing.Thisishowhewearsit.MONICA:Howwhowearsit?PHOEBE:DemiMoore.MONICA:DemiMooreisnotahe.PHOEBE:Well,hewasaheinArthur,andinTen.MONICA:That'sDudleyMoore.IsaidIwanteditlikeDemiMoore.PHOEBE:Oh,oh,ohmygod!MONICA:Ohmygod!PHOEBE:I'msorry,I'msorry.Whichone'sDemiMoore?MONICA:She'stheactresswhowasinDisclosure,IndecentProposal,Ghost.
PHOEBE:Oh,she'sgotgorgeoushair.MONICA:IKNOW![Scene:Frank'stailorshop,Chandlerisgettinghispantsaltered.]FRANKIE:Howlongdoyouwantthecuffs?CHANDLER:AtleastaslongasIhavethepants.FRANKIE:Ijustgotthat.Ok,nowwe'lldoyourinseam.(Heslowlymeasuresituphisleg,andChandlermakesarathersurprisedface.[Scene:MonicaandRachel's,Monicaisrecoveringfromherhaircut,Phoebeisplayingherdoctorandiscominginfromthebedroom.]RACHEL:Howisshe?PHOEBE:It'stoosoontotell.She'sresting,whichisagoodsign.ROSS:How'sthehair?PHOEBE:I'mnotgonnalietoyou,Ross,itdoesn'tlookgood.Iputaclipononeside,whichseemstohavestoppedthecurling.JOEY:Canweseeher?PHOEBE:Yourhairlookstoogood,Ithinkitwouldupsether.Ross,youcomeonin.(TheygointothebedroomleavingJoeyandRachelalone.JOEY:How'reyoudoing?RACHEL:I'mok.JOEY:Ooh,thatbad,huh?Look,Icansensewhenwomenaredepressedandvulnerable.It'soneofmygifts.RACHEL:WhenIsawhimgetoffthatplanewithher,IreallythoughtIhitrockbottom.Buttoday,it'slikethere'srockbottom,then50feetofcrap,thenme.JOEY:YougottatellRosshowyoufeel.RACHEL:Comeon.HowcanIjusttellhim?WhataboutJulie?JOEY:Whatabouther?They'veonlybeengoingoutfortwoweeks.Rosshasbeeninlovewithyouforlike10years.RACHEL:Idon'tknow,Idon'tknow.JOEY:Look,Rache,Rache,I'vebeenwithmyshareofwomen.Infact,I'vebeenwithlikealotofpeople'sshareofwomen.Thepointis,I'veneverfeltaboutanyonethewayRossfeltaboutyou.CHANDLER:(entering,angryYo,paisan!CanItalktoyouforasec?Yourtailorisaverybadman!JOEY:Frankie?What'reyoutalkingabout?ROSS:(enteringfromtehbedroomHey,what'sgoin'on?CHANDLER:Joey'stailor...tookadvantageofme.ROSS:What?JOEY:Noway.I'vebeengoingtotheguyfor12years.CHANDLER:Hesaidhewasgoingtodomyinseam,1of49Pages
andheranhishandupmyleg,andthen,therewasdefinite--ROSS:what?CHANDLER:Cupping.JOEY:That'showtheydopants!Firsttheygouponeside,theymoveitover,theygouptheotherCAROL:Itdidatfirst,butnotanymore.JOEY:Chandler?CHANDLER:So,uh,howoftencanyoudoit?CAROL:Asmuchasheneeds.JOEY:Ok,Igotone,Igotone.Ifheblowsintoone,doestheotheronegetbigger?Um,sure,that'dbegreat.Seeyathen.Bye.RACHEL:DidyoujustsayHi,Jew?MONICA:Yes.Uh,yes,Idid.Thatwasmyfriend,EddieMoskowitz.Yeah,helikesit.Reaffirmshisfaith.PHOEBE:Ben,dinner!ROSS:ThanksAuntPheebs.Hey,youdidn'tside,theymoveitback,andthentheydotherear.What?Ross,Ross,wouldyoutellhim?Isn'tthathowtheymeasurepants?ROSS:you?Yes,yesitis.Inprison!WhatsamatterwithJOEY:[day.Scene:What?That'snot?Ohmygod.MonicaandRachel's,laterthatMONICA:Monicaisnowoutandabout.]better.EvenMaryTylerMoorewould'vebeenROSS:MONICA:Ilikeit.Ido,Ithinkit'saTen.CHANDLER:Thankyou.Myhairisveryamused.worse.Comeon,Monica,thingscouldandNewYorkCity.Iknowit'scrazy,butit'strue.YoucouldgetcaughtbetweenthemoonbePHOEBE:ROSS:Thankyou.RACHEL:Well,Igottago.Bye.Bye,Rache.Wait,areyouleaving?(stickingherheadinfromthebalconyROSS:RACHEL:Yeah,that'skindawhatImeantby"bye!"ROSS:JOEY:test...
Okay.(goesoutontothebalconyWell,canItalktoyouforasec?Hey,whenthedoctordoesthatherniaCHANDLER:[Outonthebalcony]That'sok.ROSS:RACHEL:What'sgoin'on?together.ItwasjustastupidthingIdid,andifIWell,firstofall,PauloandIarenotbackcouldwouldn't.Um,secondofall,what?(Rosslaughsgobackintimeanddoitagain,well,IROSS:tobreakupwithaguy,andthenItellyouwhatIthink,know,Ok.Well,beforeIsayanything,Ijustneedisthisoneofthosethingswhereyouandthenthenextdayyougetbacktogetherwiththeguy,andIlooklikeacompleteidiot?RACHEL:ROSS:Ihatehim.Iphysicallyhatehim.Ialwayshave.Well,then,Ithink,Ithinktheguyisscum.No.No-no-no-no.Youarewaytoogoodtobewithaguylikethat.Youdeservetobewithsomeonewhoappreciatesyou,amazing,andwhogetshowknow?thinking"Ohmygod,I'mwithRachel".Youknow,Someoneandadorable,whowakesandfunnysexyandsweetandupeveryyouare,morningyousomeonewhomakesyoufeelgood,thewayIamwithJulie.Wasthereasecondofall?RACHEL:[Cutbackinside,Joeyisonthephone.]No,Ithinkthatwasthewholeall.JOEY:measurepants.Isweartogod,Dad.That'snothowtheyCLOSINGCREDITS[haircutfromPhoebe.]Scene:CentralPerk,JulieiswantingtogetherJULIE:youknow,likeAndyMcDowell'snewhaircut?Iwasthinkingofdoingitalittleshorter,PHOEBE:JULIE:Youwannadoitrightnow?PHOEBE:Great!(Julieleavessurethistime.AndyMcDowell'sthegirlfromFour(toRachelOk,IjustwannabereallyWeddingsandaFuneral,right?RACHEL:McDowell.AndyMcDowellistheguyfromPlanetofNo.Nonononono.That'sRodneytheApes.PHOEBE:RACHEL:Oh,yeah.Ok,thankyou.END
You'rewelcome.202TheOneWiththeBreastMilk
[showingoffBentothegang.]Scene:MonicaandRachel's,CarolandSusanareMONICA:presentandIknowhe'sgonnagrowoutoftheminlike,20Ok,(enteringfromherbedroomcarryingathesewereunbelievablyexpensive,minutes,butIcouldn'tresist.(TherealittlepairofNikeshoes.PHOEBE:(BenstartstocryOhmygod,oh,ok,wasthattooOh,lookatthese!Hey,Ben.Justdoit.muchpressureforhim?SUSAN:CAROL:Oh,ishehungryalready?Ben.Iguessso.(CarolstartstobreastfeedCHANDLER:takingplacenexttohimsomethingfunnyaboutYouknow,it's...(seesthefeedingsneakers.I'llberightback.(GoesintothekitchenJOEY:ROSS:(joinshimIgottagetone,too.youguysdoing?(followingthemintothekitchenWhatareCHANDLER:Ladle?We'rejusthangingoutbythespoons.ROSS:mostnaturalbeautifulthingintheworld.Look,wouldyouguysgrowup?ThatistheJOEY:onit.Yeah,weknow,butthere'sababysuckin'ROSS:happenalot,soyou'dbettergetusedtoit.NowifThisismysonhavinglunch,ok?It'sgonnayouuncomfortable,justaskquestions.Carol'sfinewithhaveanyproblemwithit,ifyou'reit,nowcomeon.(TheygobackintothelivingroomCHANDLER:Joeybreast-feeding?couldCarol,Carol?IwasjustwonderingifaskyouaquestionaboutCAROL:JOEY:Uh,doesithurt?Sure.OPENINGTITLES[
microwavethat,didyou,becauseit'sbreastmilk,andJULIE:Scene:you'renotsupposedtodothat.RACHEL:Rachel,doyouhaveanymuffinsleft?CentralPerk,thegangisallthere.]PHOEBE:JULIE:Ok.Duh,IthinkIknowhowtoheatbreastmilk.wantone?Oh,you'rebusy,that'sok,I'llgetit.AnybodyelseYeah,Iforgetwhichones.CHANDLER:ALL:PHOEBE:Whatdidyoujustdo?JULIE:Nothanks.
ROSS:Thereyougo.(TiesitbackupforherOh,you'relosin'yourapronhere,letmegetit.PHOEBE:It'sbreastmilk.Ilickedmyarm,what?RACHEL:RACHEL:So?ChandlerWhatabitch.(toJulieThankyou.(underherbreathtoperson.Phoebe,thatisjuice,squeezedfromaJULIE:JOEY:BloomingdalesOh,listenyouguys.ICHANDLER:Whatisthebigdeal?abusehisdiscount.So,anyonewanttocomewithmeandwho'squittingtomorrowhaveandthishefriendwantsattoROSS:Whatdidyoujustdo?takeadvantageofit?PHOEBE:Ok,wouldpeoplestopdrinkingthebreastmilk?PHOEBE:ROSS:Youwon'teventasteit?vet.Ican't,IhavetotakemygrandmothertothePHOEBE:No!MONICA:ROSS:JULIE:Ok,um,I'llgowithyou.
missingchildonit.NotNotevenifyoujustpretendthatit'smilk?evenifCarol'sbreasthadapictureofaROSS:Great.MONICA:CHANDLER:(entersHi,honey.RACHEL:ROSS:Hey,sweetums.been?
Hey,whereiseverybody?TheytookBentothepark.Where'veyouALL:MONICA:JOEY:Hi!Hellototherest.qualitytimewithme.Thanksforyourjacket.Justout.Hadsomelunch,justme,littlewithher?WhataboutRachel?Monicawhat'reyoudoin'?Youcan'tgoshoppingRACHEL:MONICA:way.Hereareyourkeys,hon.Mon,ifuhyouwereatOh,noproblem.Youcanborrowit,bytheCHANDLER:It'sgonnabeaproblem,isn'tit?lunchalone,howcomeitcostyouuh53dollars?Julie?Comeon,you'regoingtoBloomingdaleswithMONICA:worship.That'slikecheatingonRachelinherhouseofSomeonemustastolenmycreditcard.Youknowwhatprobablyhappened?MONICA:RACHEL:PHOEBE:ButI'm--pocketAndsortajustputthereceiptbackinyourdoginthestreet.Monica,shewillkillyou.ShewillkillyoulikeaMONICA:ROSS:isexcellent.Thatisanexcellentexcellentquestion.Thattomorrow?So,uh,JulestellsmeyouguysaregoingshoppingRACHEL:MONICA:lunchwith?Monica,whatiswithyou?Who'dyouhaveROSS:Yeah,uh,it'sactuallynotthatbigadeal.MONICA:appreciatethis.It'sabigdealtome.Thisisgreat,Monica.IreallyRACHEL:Judy.MONICA:MONICA:Who?PHOEBE:RACHEL:Julie.[MONICA:What?cologne.]Scene:Woof,woof.You'rewelcome.ADepartment
Store,Joeyissellingmen'sRACHEL:Jody.JOEY:MONICA:YouwerewithJulie?Annabelle.Bijanformen?Bijanformen?Bijanformen?HeyniceANNABELLE:Andthen,onethingledtoanotherand,beforeIknewtoherLook,whenitstartedIwasjusttryingtobebecauseshewasmybrother'sgirlfriend.guy?Hey,Joey.Sodidyouhearaboutthenewit,wewere...shopping.JOEY:RACHEL:ANNABELLE:Who?MONICA:Oh.Ohmygod.
justcallhimtheHombreman.Nobodyknowshisname.Meandthegirlsmeananythingtome.Honey,wait.Weonlydiditonce.Itdidn'tJOEY:RACHEL:ANNABELLE:What'shedoin'inmysection?MONICA:Yeah,right.JOEY:Iguesshedoesn'tknow.wholetime.Look,I'msorry,allright.InevermeantforReally,Rachel,Iwasthinkingofyouthehowyadoin'?Well,he'sgonna.I'llseeyoualittlelater,ok?Hey,youtofindout.TODD:RACHEL:JOEY:Mornin'.
MONICA:Oh,please,youwantedtogetcaught.thatListen,Iknowyou'renew,butit'skindaunderstoodRACHEL:Thatisnottrue!territory.everythingfromYoungMen'stotheescalatorismyinhere?Oh,soyoujustsortofhappenedtoleaveitTODD:MONICA:JOEY:Yourterritory,huh?thatstupid?DiditeveroccurtoyouthatImightjustbeGUY:Yeah.Bijanformen?RACHEL:TODD:Nothanks.DidyougowithhertoBloomingdales?Oh!Ok,ok,ok,Ok,Monica.Ijusthavetoknowonething.GUY:Hombre?Ijustreally,uh,IjustreallyneedtonotbewithyouTODD:Yeah.Allright.rightnow.[MONICA:MONICA:Scene:Youweresaying?CentralPerk,PhoebeisthereasMonicaenters.]working?It'sMonica.Yes,IknowIdidahorriblething.Hi,who'sthis?Hi,Joanne.IsRachelshoppingallday.Phoebe,listen.Youwerewithme,andwewereJoanna,it'snotassimpleasallthat,ok?No,Idon'tPHOEBE:carewhatStevethinks.Hi,Steve.MONICA:What?CAROL:PHOEBE:Wewereshopping,andwehadlunch.PHOEBE:Howdidwedo?MONICA:Oh,allright.WhatdidIhave?out.Oh,ItastedBen'smilk,andRossfreakedPHOEBE:Youhadasalad.ROSS:RACHEL:Oh,nowonderIdon'tfeelfull.CAROL:Ididnotfreakout.PHOEBE:(enteringHey,guys,what'sup.ROSS:Why'dyoufreakout?salad.IwentshoppingwithMonicaallday,andIhadaCAROL:Becauseit'sbreastmilk.It'sgross.RACHEL:SUSAN:Mybreastmilkisgross?PHOEBE:Good,Pheebs.What'dyoubuy?ROSS:RACHEL:Um,wewentshoppingforum,for,fur.justdon'tthinkbreastmilkisforadults.No,no,Carol.There'snothingwrongwithit.IThisshouldbefun.PHOEBE:Youwentshoppingforfur?CHANDLER:sothenweboughtsome,(seesMonicapointingatherchestYes,andthenIrealizedI'magainstthat,anduh,grown-upsandkidsalike.Ofcoursethepackagingdoesappealtouh,boobs.CAROL:RACHEL:deal.Justtasteit.Ross,you'rebeingsilly.I'vetriedit,it'snobigPHOEBE:Youboughtboobs?ROSS:boughtbras!Weboughtbras.(MonicaisyankingonherbrastrapBras!WePHOEBE:Thatwouldbeno.[
JOEY:Comeon.Itdoesn'ttastebad.cologne.]Scene:TheDepartmentStore,JoeyistryingtosellsomeSUSAN:Yeah,it'skindasweet,sortalike,uh--JOEY:JOEY:Cantaloupejuice.wonderingifmaybeafterworkyouandIcouldgomaybeBijanformen?Hey,Annabelle,Uh,listen,IwasROSS:Exactly.grabacupofcoffee.SUSAN:You'vetastedit?You'vetastedit.ANNABELLE:ROSS:Uhhuh.TODD:SUSAN:Oh,you'vetastedit.ANNABELLE:Ready,Annabelle?Oh,actuallyIsortahaveplans.true.Youcankeepsayingit,butitwon'tstopbeingJOEY:ROSS:sprayingcologne.Bijanformen?Hey,it'snotthefirsttimeIlostagirltoacowboyYoubet.Maybesomeothertime?CHANDLER:Gimmethebottle.Gimmethetowel.[JOEY:Rosstowatch.]Scene:MonicaandRachel's,CarolisdroppingBenofffor
overtoHombre.Gimmeaboxajuice.Well,theyswitchedmeHowdy.CAROL:CHANDLER:forafterhisnaps,notbeforehisnapsorhewon'tsleep.Ok,andthisisFunnyClown.FunnyClownisonlyyou'redressed.Well,maybeit'sbecauseofthewayROSS:JOEY:agoodtime.Welaugh,weplay.It'slikewe'refatherandCarol,we'vebeenthroughthisbefore,ok?Wehavetheywannaputmorepeopleonit.YoushouldseethisOrmaybeit'sbecausethisguy'sdoingsogoodson.guy,Chandler,hegoesthroughtwobottlesaday.SUSAN:CHANDLER:surprised.I'malovelyperson.Honey,relax.Rossisgreatwithhim.Don'tlooksoisyourdayjob.Thisisn'tsupposedtomeananythingtoWhatdoyoucare?You'reanactor.ThisRACHEL:you.SUSAN:Oh,thisissocute.JOEY:ROSS:Oh,Igotthatforhim.beingthebest.Idon'tknow.MaybeIshouldjustgetIknow,but,Iwasthebest,youknow?IlikedMONICA:Mymommiesloveme.That'sclever.Hello?Oh,Hi,Ju--Hi,Jew!Uhhuh?Uhhuh?Ok.outtathegame.Theyneedguysupinhousewarestoservecheese.2of49Pages

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